Recently, the Lord has been speaking to me through circumstances in my own life, and the lives of others, about death. It's been very weird, sparked first by the sudden passing of my own father, and then in the passing of Stephen Curtis Chapman's daughter and now Greg Laurie's son. All the books I have been reading, that just happened in my lap have been about death and tragedy.
So, needless to say, I have been thinking a lot about death and what it means to me, and my fears related to it. I almost never want to think about it. Not that I fear going to heaven...just the way that I might end up there. I know that it is a fear that, in my mind is totally unfounded, but in my heart...I feel anyway. I have been struggling with it for the past couple of months, trying to give it away to the Lord.
He really has been doing a work in me. Teaching me to trust in His ultimate sovereignty and love. I know that He has a time for me here on Earth, and that no matter how long I live, even if it's 80 years, will be ultimately short. I have always had this feeling that I am young, and through High School, felt like time just dragged on. But, now that I have hit the 30's, I can't believe how quickly those years flashed before my eyes.
My job, during what time I have here, is to give my life as a living sacrifice to the Lord. I now realize that it is that which will quell my fear. If I live my life for the Lord, as unto the Lord, using the days as if each were my last, then I will have peace in knowing when it's time to go, I'll be ready.
All, that to say, I just listened to Jon Courson's teaching at Harvest Christian Fellowship down in California after Christopher Laurie's passing. It was very touching, and helped me to bring all that the Lord has been showing me to light in a really awesome way. I know I will never be immune from pain, I know I will never be immune from tragedy; because of sin, it's inevitable to us all. But, I can be immune to the doubt and fear that tries to creep in after something like that happens. I hope you watch the video and are touched in a great way!
Jon's Teaching
Saturday, August 9, 2008
What Do You Do Now?
Posted by AshlandFive at 10:15 AM
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2 comments:
Hey Laura, it's Randi from Athey! So wierd cause I have been feeling like there has been a lot of death lately too, and it is starting to creep me out. Just today again with Bernie Mac. Crazy! Donny actually listened to that teaching and said it was great too. Thanks for your words!
"I have no fear of drowning, it's the breathing that's taking all this work.." (Jars of Clay's, Good Monster's album, I highly reccomend it-a good dark, Christian album if you will :)
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